never deny your true feelings
by don'thaveagoodpenname
Summary: Edward has always annoyed Bella but one day Bella realises that Edward isn't that bad and thinks she might like him, but when Bella denies those feelings and Edward gets a girlfriend will Bella be able to refuse those feelings any longer will she tell
1. Chapter 1

**A/N This is my very first fan fic so please tell me what you think. **

Today was my first day at forks high school and I was so excited. During the holidays I had met a girl named Alice and we became really good friends. With Alice it's not like normal friendships we go absolutely bonkers together and when we're mad we call each other bitches then say "let's be friends again" and hug. We are some of the weirdest people you will ever meet and we love it. I was interrupted by my thoughts when Alice came and knocked me over with one of her (not so) 'special' five minute hugs.

"How's it goin Bella? I haven't talked to you since…." She said trying to remember how long ago it was that we talked.

"Omg did you see that new trailer for that movie that we wanna see you know the one with the chick and the guy and the whats-a-majig?" Alice said with the upmost excitement.

I looked at her confused; I have always wondered how she can get off topic so fast. "What?" she said with the slightest bit of sarcasm in her voice.

We just looked at each other, started laughing, linked arms and started walking into school together.

"Ok so I'm going to introduce you to the rest of the guys in a minute they normally hangout by the library. Ok so there's Jasper which you obviously know cause well we have been going out for the past 5 months." Alice said in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Yer yer of course I know who Jasper is, I mean you do talk about him in your sleep 'O Jasper, keep goin, O Jasper' I said trying to hold back the laughter that I knew would follow. Alice just stared at me with the most evil death stare and the phrase "If looks could kill" came to mind.

"Anywhooo…" I said trying to get out of the hole I had dug. (I do that a lot, you know when you talk to much and say the wrong thing and then you're just screwed well I call it word vomit and I have a very bad case of it, they should really find a cure) "Who else is there?"

"Well there's Edward who is just the most annoying little know-it-all you have ever met and he is not afraid to admit it, he even tells you he is up himself but you will get used to it; it may take some time but u will get used to it." Alice said this as we approached the outside of the library and stated waving over to the two boys standing over at the wall.

"Heyy guys" Alice said as we came over to them. Edward returned the greeting with a wide, beautiful, crocked, teeth showing smile where as Jasper returned the greeting with a long passionate kiss. After about a minute without them coming up for air I said "Hey lover birds feel like coming up for air anytime soon?" They stoped not realising that they had been at it for so long. I cleared my throat waiting for Alice to introduce me to Edward.

"Oh" Alice said forgetting the Edward didn't know me. "Edward, this is Bella, Bella Edward." I looked at him and smiled, "Hey" he said in a voice that sounded so sweet. Hi" I said feeling the blood rush to my cheeks. I didn't realise that I was staring at him until the bell rand signalling that school had started. "What do you have Bella?" Alice asked. "Ummm..." I said pulling my timetable from my bag, "Music in room 82"

I said excitedly I loved music it was one of the things I was really good at.

"Hey don't you have music to Edward?" Alice asked. "Yer that's cool me and Bella in the same class, she'll know someone for her first class." Edward said with a smile on his face.

All throughout music Edward was just talking and talking and talking about all the stuff that he knew as if he knew everything in the entire world.

That day I found out that Alice was right and Edward really was the most annoying person I have ever met.

**A/N: Sooo people what do you think? If you like it tell me because there is plenty more where that came from, I've had this story in my head for a while and I finally decided to get it down on the computer but if it's no good so far tell me please. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review this is my very first fan fic.**


	2. Chapter 2

Edward was in almost all my classes and he was really stating to get on my nerves. He was a nice guy sometimes but 99.9% of the time he was the irritating person to be around. I only hung around him because him and Alice were friends. We would usually greet each other and then he would just bug me, I think that it was just because he wanted a reaction and most of the time I was silly enough to give him one.

Arhhhh he was frustrating!

Today we were in pe theory and I was on the end of the table with Alice sitting next to me and on the other side of Alice was Edward. I think we were doing work of self esteem or something boring like that. "So now I want you to find the information on the sheet and then answer the questions on page 55 of your work book. You can work in pairs if you want, just get the work done." Mr Lochay said pulling me out of whatever I was thinking about before I can't really remember what it was oh well.

I looked over to see that Alice was basically gagging on the inside and stated to laugh, she looked at me and started laughing too, before we knew it we were having a conversation about usual things like what movies we wanted to see or the newest gossip that we heard, but me and Alice gossiping…..nooooo I said sarcastically in my head and laughed a little at my thought. "What?" Alice said. "Nothing just laughing at my thought" I replied to Alice noticing that Edward was getting impatient because we normally did our work together. Jasper was in this class but he was with he's other friends doing the work, Alice didn't mind though.

"Ok," he said pulling the information sheet towards him "let me read it so I can give you the answers" he said in a sarcastic kind of voice. There was only one sheet to share between us and Edward had it between himself and Alice. I was getting tired of waiting knowing that I could to the work much faster if I could just skim through the information sheet and do the answers while Alice and Edward mucked around a bit.

I went to reach over and pull the information sheet towards me so that it was in front of Alice so he could still see it. I started reading the sheet when I saw it sliding away. "Hey" I said the annoyance clear in my voice. He just looked at me with eyes that basically said _why do you want to do the work it's not like your any good at it._ I replied to this look by saying "I am perfectly capable of doing my own work thank you very much." He made a noise kind of like feeeee kind of sound basically saying _yer as if. _I was so annoyed at this statement that I literally picked up my stuff moved it to the free desk in front of me, went to the front to get a sheet for my self and spent the rest of the lesson doing the work by myself. Underestimate my intelligence will he, he doesn't even know me that…… I was at a loss of words… so and so. Arhhhhh, god he annoyed me.

When the bell had went signalling the end of class and the beginning of lunch I picked up my belongings and headed straight for my locker. Alice wasn't too far behind me and I could tell when she was next to me not knowing weather to say anything or not. "I'm sorry for what happened before." She said. I looked at her in surprise and said, "it's not your fault, you didn't do anything, I'm not mad at you." "Yer I know that but I could have said something or…something" she said. I turned to Alice and gave her a hug "Alice its ok I will get over it soon anyway it just really pissed me off. I'm ok. Anywhoo lets go get some lunch, I'm hungry. Alice smiled and we linked arms and headed off to the lockers.

When we had finished putting our books away and collecting our lunch I said to her "can we not sit with Edward today I just don't want to if that's ok with you?" I asked her just as she was headed to where we usually sit. "Ok, I wanted to introduce you some of my other friends anyway, their dying to meet you." Alice said excitedly pulling me towards a table where a beautiful, no drop dead gorgeous girl was standing picking at her lunch. "Rosalie!" Alice said well actually more like screamed. "Hey Alice how you doin" Rosalie said to Alice with a beautiful smile heading our way. "Rosalie this is Bella, Bella Rosalie" I smiled at her and to my surprise she took me in a large friendly hug.

Alice Rosalie and myself were talking amongst ourselves when who else but Edward comes up and just starts talking to Alice and Rosalie acting like I wasn't there. This made me even more pissed off. I walked away going to talk to Rosalie's friends but I weren't to sure of their names so I just made small talk. After about a minute or two Alice noticed it was bugging me and came over to me to talk. "I'm sorry" she mouthed to me as I was in the middle of talking to…um what was her name, I forget, oh well. Seconds after Alice came to sit by me Rosalie's boyfriend, Emmet I think he's name was, walked over and started kissing Rose like there was no tomorrow so Edward came to sit with Alice.

I was like he was trying to annoy me. I took in a few deep breaths and reached to get my mp3 out of my pocket. I put the headphones in my ears and put on song and put it up loud to drown out the annoying sound that was Edwards voice.

I didn't talk to Edward for weeks.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N heyy so im sorry if there are any mistakes in here but just go with and and tell me what you think of it at the end I would really appreciate reviews. =]**

My annoyance with Edward was starting to wear off and we were becoming friends. I wasn't afraid to tell him that he was a smart ass and he wasn't afraid to tell me I was being a bitch. We would muck around a lot like pushing and shoving each other in a jokingly fashion and always trying to beat each other at things. But today it was a really good day.

When we were in English we were doing some group work. In the group it was Alice, Jasper and Edward. We had all put our heads together and just done the work so we were finished in plenty of time, so we started to muck around a bit. I was in a happy mood so I wasn't hard to make me laugh and Jasper and Edward knew that so they were just doing stupid things to make me laugh and I enjoyed it.

I was sitting next to Edward and Alice and Jasper was in front of Alice so he could hole her hand. I was already giggling when jasper pulled up his shorts a little bit and said "hey Alice" in a joking way, he always knew how to put a smile on that girls face. I looked over to see what was happening and saw jasper mucking around with Alice. I immediately started laughing mostly because of the fact that it reminded me of something that our friend Mike had done earlier I started laughing hysterically and Alice stated at me wonder what was that funny. All I had to say was 'thighs' in between laughter and she knew what I was laughing about soon we were both in hysterics laughing so loudly that the whole class was staring at us wondering what was so funny. Alice had calmed down a bit but with me once u stated to get me going I was off and wouldn't stop for a while. "It wasn't that funny was it?" Jasper asked me and I just looked at Alice to explain. "No it's just a joke from earlier and what you did reminds her of it I'll tell you about it later" she said.

After a while I had calmed down and we were just talking. I can't remember what triggered it up Edward had started poking me in sides. I was very ticklish so I was laughing I lot. "Stop it" I managed to say in between laughs. "Please" I said trying to stop him from doing it. He just liked the reaction out of me so of course he continued to do it. Soon I was gripping on to his arm trying to fall of my seat with laughter. I was leaning away from him trying to escape the pokes when I fell off my chair onto the ground. I laughed a bit more than calmed down. Edward held out his hand offering to help me up. I took his hand and stood up. Just as I arose from the ground the bell rung and everybody was leaving the room.

****

We left the English room heading for the change rooms to get changed for gym. After we had changed we walked out to discover that we were doing a big run then a running test after it. I moaned in discomfort because I hated, hated, hated pe with a passion.

After we had finished the run I had a bit of a head ache so I let down my hair from the messy bun I had it in. When I let it own I looked into a window seeing how messy it was and let me tell you it was messy. I didn't really care much and walked over to where the rest of the class was. As I approached Edward, Alice and Jasper I asked openly "My hair is so messy isn't it?" I wasn't really expecting an answer from Alice of Jasper because they were lost in each others eyes so I looked to Edward for an answer. "It is a bit but nothing a bit of a brush couldn't fix" he said raising his hand to pat it down a bit. I smiled at him then watched him walk away so he could hear what the teacher was saying.

****

In the last period of the day, Study Hall we were once again just mucking around, especially me and Edward. Edward and I were just being silly with each other and I kind of felt just comfortable. He was poking me again and I was laughing and holding on to him trying not to fall off my chair. He accidently blew in my ear and I felt my face go bright red as the sweet, hot breath tickled my ear. When he saw the reaction I gave when he did that he kept on doing it and I was doing to him as well. We were just mucking around.

****

When I was lying in bed last night and going over the days events I found my self blushing and smiling when I came across the thoughts of Edward and me mucking around. Was I getting a crush on him? For a second there I smiled at the idea but then when I thought about it I said "no I can't I mean its Edward. Annoying, know-it-all, smart ass Edward." out loud trying to convince myself that I didn't like him. But I just couldn't like him. Could I?

I contemplated the idea all night and when I awoke in the morning I thought no I don't like Edward he was just mucking around with me. We were friends. That's all friends.

Over the next couple of days I was being such a bitch to Edward because I was trying to deny to myself that I didn't like him in that way. I felt like such a bitch and just buried those feelings in the back of my mind for the moment.

**Review please =]**


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry for the short chapter but the next one will be longer.**

**I don't get disclaimer I think there stupid I mean seriously if I owned twilight would I be writing this?? I don't think so.**

A few weeks past and I was still trying to deny those feelings for Edward, and in my opinion I was doing a pretty good job of it so much so that I had almost forgotten about them altogether. Every now and then we would muck around with each other and those feeling would come rushing back but I would just put them all back away.

When Alice and I went ice skating on Sunday afternoon we were talking about our friends (nothing bad of course) and pretty much useless stuff and somehow the topic of who Edward liked came up. It was such a year three thing to do but I was just interested. Edward and Alice were pretty good friends so of course he told her. "oh come on Alice you can tell me it's not like I'm gonna go tell the whole world". I said pleadingly. "Bella I'm sorry I just cant I told him I wouldn't tell anybody and I feel as if I was betraying him if I did". I skated off a little bit and I wasn't long before I could sense that Alice was right behind me. "Fine but I'll find out one day" I said and started skating away.

***

Next week on Friday I was just in my room listening to music and looking through magazines when Alice called me. It was kind of a thing that Alice and I did on Friday nights, one of us would call and we would talk for hours about things that had happened that week or just stuff. I picked up the phone and started chatting away to Alice. Halfway through the conversation the topic of Edward came up and all of a sudden Alice said "oh yer he's like going out with this girl called Lauren, she doesn't go to our school but she does like piano or something with him". I was kind of shocked by what Alice had just said but I needed to say something soon I didn't really want Alice to know so I said "oh yer, tell me more" trying to sound like a gossiping girl. While Alice was going on about who she was and things I was on my computer looking through Edwards facebook friends trying to find a picture of her. When I finally did I said to Alice "I found a picture of her on facebook, she's kinda pretty I suppose" she was actually really pretty I just didn't want to say it. Alice soon got side tracked and started talking about something else.

***

A few weeks later we were in math and we had finished up early and we were all gossiping about people who weren't in the class. Edward came up and the fact that he had a girlfriend. I felt that if I didn't say anything about it people would get suspicious so I told them everything I knew about it. The next day when we were on the bus going on an excursion me and Alice were playing around with a love calculator app on my iPod. Edward and Rosalie were sitting behind us and saw what we were doing and joined in. It was all fun and games until Rosalie said "Oh I know put in Edward and Lauren." Edward got embarrassed and tried to stop me from doing it. When I saw that they got 86% my heart kind of broke a bit but I hid it away with a smile (I was good at doing that too). Edward sunk back into his seat with embarrassment so Alice and I turned around trying to hide our laughter. I felt the urge to say something so I said "Oh come on don't be so embarrassed I mean everybody knows" He looked shocked and turned to Alice and Rose for confirmation, they both nodded their heads.

"I mean it even came up in math the other day and you're not even in that class" he looked embarrassed and I just turned around before I could say anything more.


	5. the end

Ok im sorry but I don't think that im gonna write this story anymore I don't really feel like it anymore. I did this to become content about a certain incident and now I think I finally am so I am really sorry to the people who would have liked to read this but I just don't want to write it anymore. I may start writing again later but for now I will say good bye. Im thinking about writing another story soon but im not really sure …so yer.

Thanx to all the people who read the first 4 chapters and who reviewed and put me on story/author alert. Thanx thanx double thanx

Xoxo


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